Context
As I was heading to Texarkana for Friends meeting today, I saw a dog running along the side of the road. After some internal debate, I pulled a u-turn and went to go look for it. I found the dog, but he ran away from me and seemed to be heading for a house a little ways off the road, so I gave up the chase.
Commentary
It was important to me to include the "internal debate" stuff in the Context, because I didn't want to go after this dog. Attending to stray dogs is a hassle. You often can't catch them, and when you do manage to get them in your car, you then have to decide what to do with them. Even if they have a collar with a current tag on, reaching the owners is sometimes a matter of several phone calls, and where does the dog stay in the interim?
No collar, no tag is even worse. Take the dog to the shelter? OK if it's open, but it often isn't, and even if it is, sometimes the people there suspect that you're dropping off your dog, not a stray, and give you a hard time. I used to work at the SPCA; I understand the instinct.
So why did I do something I didn't want to do? I think I know, but first I want to talk about some arguments I don't find compelling. You could say that I really did want to go after the dog, and that may be true, but as an explanation it's completely useless. If I can't even consciously access my own motivations and desires, there is little point in trying to analyze my actions. There's just this shadow self of mine that apparently does whatever it feels like.
Similarly, I find deterministic explanations of behavior problematic. By "deterministic" I mean both the religious idea of predestination and the scientific theory that brain chemistry controls everything. Despite their disparate backgrounds, these two ideas are remarkably similar in effect: they remove personal responsibility and self-actualization from the equation.
Also, it seems like determinism is both overly simple and overly complex. Simple in that it would answer every behavioral question the same way, either "God made me do it," or "My neurons made me do it." The complexity comes in when you look at that internal debate I mentioned earlier. It seems remarkably inefficient for either God or my brain to decide I should do go after a stray dog, then let me spend several seconds mulling the decision over. Why not just send me off right away?
So maybe you're thinking the reason I went after the dog was because even though I didn't want to, I thought it was the right thing to do. This is certainly closer to the truth, in that I do think stray dogs present an ethical problem. My husband will tell you that I grieve and pray over dead animals in the road, but for me, domesticated animals are a special case. At some point in our history as human beings we made agreements with dogs and cats that we would take care of them in return for some service. A stray dog indicates that we've dropped our end of the leash, if you take my meaning.
However, the reality is that I don't always go after every stray dog I see and even today, I didn't move heaven and earth to capture this one. So why did I perform this particular set of somewhat unusual actions today? Because I received a very specific call from God and (eventually) answered it. It's not predestination; it's a conversation with God about what I'm going to do. People look at me funny when I say that the reason I don't drink caffeine is because I had an argument with God about it and lost, but it's the truth!
In this case, the call was to go see if I could help the dog. Once it starting running away, I was released from the call. If you're not religious, you may prefer to think that my conscience smote me on this particular occasion, and that's fine. From my perspective, doing something I don't want to do seems so unlike me that it feels like an external presence. Ergo God.
"C'mon Lynn," you may be saying, "why would an omniscient God ask you to do something so pointless? Stop your trip, turn around, and not even catch the dog? What's up with that?"
I don't know, which is another reason I point the finger at an external God rather than my own internal mechanisms. This whole blog post has illustrated that I like to have good explanations for the things I do. Sometimes, it seems like God just says, "Nah, let's do this instead."
Which doesn't mean I can't impose an explanation after the fact, so here are are two possibilities:
1) Obedience is more important than results.
2) It made me blog about God, right?
What did you see today?
Showing posts with label travel. Show all posts
Showing posts with label travel. Show all posts
12/22/2012
6/04/2011
I saw a driver slow down
Context
When I drive to Texarkana on Saturdays to attend my Quaker meeting, I usually obey the posted speed limit. Since a great deal of my trip takes place on a two-lane highway, this means when people pass me, they then pull in front of me.
A gentleman driving an older sedan with cracks in the windshield did this today. Shortly thereafter we came upon three vehicles on the opposite shoulder, one of which belonged to the Caddo Parish Sheriff's office and had its lights flashing. Louisiana law requires us to move over or slow down for vehicles with flashing lights on our own shoulder, but there are no obligations pertaining to vehicles on the opposite side. Nevertheless, the guy who had just passed me slowed down considerably, even going a few MPH under the speed limit. I was tempted to pass him, but restrained myself.
Commentary
My first reaction to the driver slowing down ahead of me was, "My driving decisions make my life easier." Consider: except for the "move over or slow down" rule mentioned above, I never have to change how I'm driving when I see a member of law enforcement. Other people have to make numerous adjustments.
Not that my method is entirely stress-free. When people pass me on the two-lane, they sometimes express annoyance, and I'm not completely immune to that. Nonetheless, I'd have to say my method of driving is the one that brings me the most peace.
Making all our decisions according to which ones will bring us the most peace is not a bad way to go, although it is complicated by the need to predict how we'll feel in the future on a regular basis. If nothing else, we can evaluate our current path to see if it's bringing us peace and make adjustments accordingly. Who knows? Doing this often enough might improve our powers of prediction.
So what do we define as peace? I'll admit that for me it has the air of "I know it when I feel it," but I'll try to be more definite. I think we can all agree that peace is not worry or stress or guilt, but I would venture to say it's not necessarily happiness or satisfaction, either. As mentioned previously, I often get a great deal of visceral satisfaction when I do the wrong thing. There's always psychic damage to clean up afterwards, though.
Absence of conflict is a reasonably good definition of peace, but it depends on how you define conflict (wheels within wheels!). I often find that making a good decision for me causes opposition from other people. What really tears me up is when I make the right choice for myself and someone else makes the right choice for her/himself and we still end up in conflict! These disputes can usually be resolved by recognizing our differing needs and perspectives, but still!
I also can't really say that making good decisions means I won't be conflicted about them. Change, even good change, is often very stressful. However, I usually find that once I've made my initial commitment and taken the first few steps, most of the strain falls away. Peace manifests in the feeling that a way is opening up for me.
If peace is the revelation of a path we can follow, then I have to say that neither complacency nor resignation fits the bill. Complacency does its level best to never move at all, and resignation implies that one is not deciding where to go. I do, however, have to leave room for the radical resignation that says, "I'm giving up everything to follow God's will."
There, I did it. Stuck God into the middle of a perfectly good (psychological? philosophical?) treatise. I can't help it, though. For me, even seeking peace is related to my religious beliefs that there is a God, that He cares about me, and that He has a plan. When I say "a way is opening up," I mean God's way. Realistically, I don't believe it's actually possible for us to thwart God's will. On the other hand, I think we can cause ourselves a lot of stress and worry by trying to.
What did you see today?
When I drive to Texarkana on Saturdays to attend my Quaker meeting, I usually obey the posted speed limit. Since a great deal of my trip takes place on a two-lane highway, this means when people pass me, they then pull in front of me.
A gentleman driving an older sedan with cracks in the windshield did this today. Shortly thereafter we came upon three vehicles on the opposite shoulder, one of which belonged to the Caddo Parish Sheriff's office and had its lights flashing. Louisiana law requires us to move over or slow down for vehicles with flashing lights on our own shoulder, but there are no obligations pertaining to vehicles on the opposite side. Nevertheless, the guy who had just passed me slowed down considerably, even going a few MPH under the speed limit. I was tempted to pass him, but restrained myself.
Commentary
My first reaction to the driver slowing down ahead of me was, "My driving decisions make my life easier." Consider: except for the "move over or slow down" rule mentioned above, I never have to change how I'm driving when I see a member of law enforcement. Other people have to make numerous adjustments.
Not that my method is entirely stress-free. When people pass me on the two-lane, they sometimes express annoyance, and I'm not completely immune to that. Nonetheless, I'd have to say my method of driving is the one that brings me the most peace.
Making all our decisions according to which ones will bring us the most peace is not a bad way to go, although it is complicated by the need to predict how we'll feel in the future on a regular basis. If nothing else, we can evaluate our current path to see if it's bringing us peace and make adjustments accordingly. Who knows? Doing this often enough might improve our powers of prediction.
So what do we define as peace? I'll admit that for me it has the air of "I know it when I feel it," but I'll try to be more definite. I think we can all agree that peace is not worry or stress or guilt, but I would venture to say it's not necessarily happiness or satisfaction, either. As mentioned previously, I often get a great deal of visceral satisfaction when I do the wrong thing. There's always psychic damage to clean up afterwards, though.
Absence of conflict is a reasonably good definition of peace, but it depends on how you define conflict (wheels within wheels!). I often find that making a good decision for me causes opposition from other people. What really tears me up is when I make the right choice for myself and someone else makes the right choice for her/himself and we still end up in conflict! These disputes can usually be resolved by recognizing our differing needs and perspectives, but still!
I also can't really say that making good decisions means I won't be conflicted about them. Change, even good change, is often very stressful. However, I usually find that once I've made my initial commitment and taken the first few steps, most of the strain falls away. Peace manifests in the feeling that a way is opening up for me.
If peace is the revelation of a path we can follow, then I have to say that neither complacency nor resignation fits the bill. Complacency does its level best to never move at all, and resignation implies that one is not deciding where to go. I do, however, have to leave room for the radical resignation that says, "I'm giving up everything to follow God's will."
There, I did it. Stuck God into the middle of a perfectly good (psychological? philosophical?) treatise. I can't help it, though. For me, even seeking peace is related to my religious beliefs that there is a God, that He cares about me, and that He has a plan. When I say "a way is opening up," I mean God's way. Realistically, I don't believe it's actually possible for us to thwart God's will. On the other hand, I think we can cause ourselves a lot of stress and worry by trying to.
What did you see today?
7/27/2010
I saw myself get angry
Context
My husband and I are traveling back from a vacation in Richmond on the Amtrak Crescent. A little before 4:00, the hostess from the dining car came around to inform us that dinner would be served at 4:30. We thought this was silly for a couple of reasons, including the fact that the train was running late. We tried to express this to her, but she appeared to be "on script" and not interested in what we were saying. I got angry, and after she left I told my husband I didn't want dinner because I didn't want to have to deal with her. She apparently heard me, because she came back to our bedroom to try to explain the situation again, but I blew her off. After some discussion with my husband, I went to the dining car (at 4:30!) and apologized to her for complaining behind her back.
Commentary
Really? The context wasn't painful enough, you want commentary? OK, here are some random thoughts:
I really do love train travel, but this particular trip has had its hiccups.
My husband is my conscience a great deal of the time.
I've had several obvious "message from God" dreams lately and at first I interpreted them as pertaining to hospitality. The more I consider them, however, the more I realize they're about anger and they come with a bright neon message: anger throws up a barrier between me and my basic beliefs about what's important, like hospitality and building relationships through good communication.
What did you see today?
My husband and I are traveling back from a vacation in Richmond on the Amtrak Crescent. A little before 4:00, the hostess from the dining car came around to inform us that dinner would be served at 4:30. We thought this was silly for a couple of reasons, including the fact that the train was running late. We tried to express this to her, but she appeared to be "on script" and not interested in what we were saying. I got angry, and after she left I told my husband I didn't want dinner because I didn't want to have to deal with her. She apparently heard me, because she came back to our bedroom to try to explain the situation again, but I blew her off. After some discussion with my husband, I went to the dining car (at 4:30!) and apologized to her for complaining behind her back.
Commentary
Really? The context wasn't painful enough, you want commentary? OK, here are some random thoughts:
I really do love train travel, but this particular trip has had its hiccups.
My husband is my conscience a great deal of the time.
I've had several obvious "message from God" dreams lately and at first I interpreted them as pertaining to hospitality. The more I consider them, however, the more I realize they're about anger and they come with a bright neon message: anger throws up a barrier between me and my basic beliefs about what's important, like hospitality and building relationships through good communication.
What did you see today?
3/06/2010
I heard a disparaging remark
Context
One of my flights back from the COSUGI conference lasted a little under three hours. During it, a baby on board screamed bloody murder at varying intervals. Once, he or she probably kept it up for a good ten minutes. At the end of the flight, a man in my row said, "Horrible flight!"
Commentary
I hate to fly. This may come as a surprise to members of my family because I used to love it, and I still do fly on a regular basis, but I hate it. Usually this hatred takes the form of mild anxiety, often for weeks before an anticipated trip, but it sometimes turns into full-blown panic while on the plane. All told, I prefer the train. So for me, "horrible flight" would either mean I cowered in terror all the way or the plane crashed at some point. I guess most people would agree that the latter would count as a horrible flight.
But I don't want to talk about how brave my seatmate was about flying or how tolerant I am of fussy children. I want to talk about what I think upsets both of us, which is the lack of control. Once I get on that plane, I can't control how it moves or whether it lands safely or not, and that makes me crazy. Under non-flying circumstances, one can usually deal with a screaming baby that's not your own by either walking away or trying to convince the parents to do so. On a plane, not so much.
So for both of us, perhaps the feeling of helplessness is upsetting. What's interesting is the difference in what makes us feel helpless. I've already spent too much time speculating about my seatmate's feelings, so I won't try and figure out why flying doesn't appear to bother him. I will say that generally, crying babies who aren't being abused by their parents don't bother me. In the situation on the plane, I wasn't helpless. I could have tuned the baby out or listened to iTunes on my laptop. What I actually did was feel sorry for the baby and the parents. It's just about impossible to explain to an infant what ear-popping is and how to handle it.
Which leads me to faith in general. I am a firm believer that God controls everything; that it's His world and we're just living in it. This does not, however, make me behave fatalistically. I believe every moment is an opportunity to decide whether we're going to try to participate in God's will, oppose it, or ignore it. I find I always do better when I try to participate. As I mentioned in an earlier post on patience, I find I do better when I spend less time on, "Why is God doing this?" and more on "Why does He want me around while He is?"
It's a good theory; I certainly don't always put it into practice. I often say, as Mother Teresa did, "I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much." On the other hand, as I was reminded when I read on this blog, I think sometimes God likes to remind us that it's not all about how well we handle things for ourselves. So I try to remember that too when I fly.
What did you hear today?
One of my flights back from the COSUGI conference lasted a little under three hours. During it, a baby on board screamed bloody murder at varying intervals. Once, he or she probably kept it up for a good ten minutes. At the end of the flight, a man in my row said, "Horrible flight!"
Commentary
I hate to fly. This may come as a surprise to members of my family because I used to love it, and I still do fly on a regular basis, but I hate it. Usually this hatred takes the form of mild anxiety, often for weeks before an anticipated trip, but it sometimes turns into full-blown panic while on the plane. All told, I prefer the train. So for me, "horrible flight" would either mean I cowered in terror all the way or the plane crashed at some point. I guess most people would agree that the latter would count as a horrible flight.
But I don't want to talk about how brave my seatmate was about flying or how tolerant I am of fussy children. I want to talk about what I think upsets both of us, which is the lack of control. Once I get on that plane, I can't control how it moves or whether it lands safely or not, and that makes me crazy. Under non-flying circumstances, one can usually deal with a screaming baby that's not your own by either walking away or trying to convince the parents to do so. On a plane, not so much.
So for both of us, perhaps the feeling of helplessness is upsetting. What's interesting is the difference in what makes us feel helpless. I've already spent too much time speculating about my seatmate's feelings, so I won't try and figure out why flying doesn't appear to bother him. I will say that generally, crying babies who aren't being abused by their parents don't bother me. In the situation on the plane, I wasn't helpless. I could have tuned the baby out or listened to iTunes on my laptop. What I actually did was feel sorry for the baby and the parents. It's just about impossible to explain to an infant what ear-popping is and how to handle it.
Which leads me to faith in general. I am a firm believer that God controls everything; that it's His world and we're just living in it. This does not, however, make me behave fatalistically. I believe every moment is an opportunity to decide whether we're going to try to participate in God's will, oppose it, or ignore it. I find I always do better when I try to participate. As I mentioned in an earlier post on patience, I find I do better when I spend less time on, "Why is God doing this?" and more on "Why does He want me around while He is?"
It's a good theory; I certainly don't always put it into practice. I often say, as Mother Teresa did, "I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much." On the other hand, as I was reminded when I read on this blog, I think sometimes God likes to remind us that it's not all about how well we handle things for ourselves. So I try to remember that too when I fly.
What did you hear today?
3/03/2010
I saw a Twitter hashtag
Context
In our opening session at the COSUGI conference today, one of our speakers put up a PowerPoint slide we were encouraging us to Twitter about happenings at the conference under the #cosugi10 hashtag.
Commentary
More conference inspiration!
I don't use Twitter. I've never understood why people who weren't standing next to me would be interested in a random short things I might have to say. Random long things, sure, that's why I have a blog. But I think the short form just lends itself to less consideration.
In fact, as soon as they started talking about the hashtag in my session, I thought of two things I could tweet and they were both unkind. As such, I would have no desire for them to be attached to my name for any period of time after I'd uttered them. And I've learned the lesson many kids haven't: any information you post on the internet could come back to haunt you later.
But what if I expanded this notion? What if I started behaving like anything I said, even just to my closest friends, could come back to haunt me later? After all, God is surely going to hear and remember it. Is that why James puts so much emphasis on controlling our tongues? Maybe the next version of the Bible should say something about tweets as well.
What did you see today?
In our opening session at the COSUGI conference today, one of our speakers put up a PowerPoint slide we were encouraging us to Twitter about happenings at the conference under the #cosugi10 hashtag.
Commentary
More conference inspiration!
I don't use Twitter. I've never understood why people who weren't standing next to me would be interested in a random short things I might have to say. Random long things, sure, that's why I have a blog. But I think the short form just lends itself to less consideration.
In fact, as soon as they started talking about the hashtag in my session, I thought of two things I could tweet and they were both unkind. As such, I would have no desire for them to be attached to my name for any period of time after I'd uttered them. And I've learned the lesson many kids haven't: any information you post on the internet could come back to haunt you later.
But what if I expanded this notion? What if I started behaving like anything I said, even just to my closest friends, could come back to haunt me later? After all, God is surely going to hear and remember it. Is that why James puts so much emphasis on controlling our tongues? Maybe the next version of the Bible should say something about tweets as well.
What did you see today?
3/02/2010
I heard about an exclusive service
Context
I’m attending a class just prior to the COSUGI conference this week. It’s the same conference as this post and this one, and even this one referred to, but they’ve changed the name of it to accommodate a merger of two vendors. This year’s conference is at Disney’s Coronado Springs Resort, where it's hard to get off the grounds of the resort itself on foot. If you want to go to Disney attractions the resort provides a free bus, but all of us in the class have found it difficult/expensive to go anywhere non-Disney related. Today I went exploring and found a Lynx stop in the “cast member” (that’s what Disney calls staff) parking lot. When I went to the concierge desk to ask for a route map for Lynx, they told me that stop is for cast members only.
Commentary
I try to stick to "just the facts" in the Context section, so now I'm going to add some emotion.
1) I mentioned that we were finding it difficult to travel to non-Disney destinations. I didn't mention that we've been here for five days and we're desperate to get off the reservation!
2) The people at the concierge desk were genuinely perplexed by my desire to ride a public bus. I, in turn, was astonished that Disney asserts enough power in Orlando that they can reserve a bus stop (probably several bus stops) for their employees only.
I'm also a little curious about what would happen if I attempted to board a bus at the "cast members only" stop. Disney prides itself on customer service, after all. On the other hand, and I mean this as a compliment, cast members at this resort have proven remarkably gifted at saying "no" while still smiling brightly. I'm still annoyed by the exclusivity of the service, though, and not just because I'm being thwarted in my plans.
I think it's also because of the message the hotel seems to be sending. One of the reasons my classmates and I want to go someplace "normal" is that Walt Disney World is unrelentingly entertainment-oriented. This is, of course, not surprising, but it can be a little wearying. Even my incredibly nice husband is concerned that he may go off on the next phone operator who wishes him a "magical evening."
This attitude may be particularly grating for me because when I go to a work conference I go to, um, work, not play. (OK, I blog, but sometimes that feels like work!) I'm not trying to sound goody-goody; I'm just a person who does not generally mix business with pleasure. I don't go to theme parks when I supposed to be attending a conference and I don't usually check e-mail when I'm on vacation.
What's interesting is I think the administration at Disney understands this work/play separation very well. That's why the public bus stop, where mundane things like commuting to and fro a job happen, is hidden a good ways away from the magical guest areas.
What did you hear today
I’m attending a class just prior to the COSUGI conference this week. It’s the same conference as this post and this one, and even this one referred to, but they’ve changed the name of it to accommodate a merger of two vendors. This year’s conference is at Disney’s Coronado Springs Resort, where it's hard to get off the grounds of the resort itself on foot. If you want to go to Disney attractions the resort provides a free bus, but all of us in the class have found it difficult/expensive to go anywhere non-Disney related. Today I went exploring and found a Lynx stop in the “cast member” (that’s what Disney calls staff) parking lot. When I went to the concierge desk to ask for a route map for Lynx, they told me that stop is for cast members only.
Commentary
I try to stick to "just the facts" in the Context section, so now I'm going to add some emotion.
1) I mentioned that we were finding it difficult to travel to non-Disney destinations. I didn't mention that we've been here for five days and we're desperate to get off the reservation!
2) The people at the concierge desk were genuinely perplexed by my desire to ride a public bus. I, in turn, was astonished that Disney asserts enough power in Orlando that they can reserve a bus stop (probably several bus stops) for their employees only.
I'm also a little curious about what would happen if I attempted to board a bus at the "cast members only" stop. Disney prides itself on customer service, after all. On the other hand, and I mean this as a compliment, cast members at this resort have proven remarkably gifted at saying "no" while still smiling brightly. I'm still annoyed by the exclusivity of the service, though, and not just because I'm being thwarted in my plans.
I think it's also because of the message the hotel seems to be sending. One of the reasons my classmates and I want to go someplace "normal" is that Walt Disney World is unrelentingly entertainment-oriented. This is, of course, not surprising, but it can be a little wearying. Even my incredibly nice husband is concerned that he may go off on the next phone operator who wishes him a "magical evening."
This attitude may be particularly grating for me because when I go to a work conference I go to, um, work, not play. (OK, I blog, but sometimes that feels like work!) I'm not trying to sound goody-goody; I'm just a person who does not generally mix business with pleasure. I don't go to theme parks when I supposed to be attending a conference and I don't usually check e-mail when I'm on vacation.
What's interesting is I think the administration at Disney understands this work/play separation very well. That's why the public bus stop, where mundane things like commuting to and fro a job happen, is hidden a good ways away from the magical guest areas.
What did you hear today
9/10/2009
I saw an e-mail from a Friend
Context
A member of the Quaker meeting I attend sent an e-mail today introducing a woman who is planning to join us for the first time on Saturday. We are a small meeting, so new people are very noticeable.
Commentary
"Go therefore an make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything that I have commanded you." These words are almost the last things Jesus says in the gospel according to Matthew (New Revised Standard Version) and are referred to as The Great Commission.
No passage in the Bible has more power to both inspire and terrify Christians. We know that Jesus has done great things for us and theoretically we want to share that good news with everyone, but the practice is often lacking. I've been sampling Jim Henderson's excellent book Evangelism Without Additives, and it has a lot to say about both our discomfiture and our ineffectualness.
Henderson talks a lot about methodology. I'd like to talk a little about goals. It seems to me that one of the sub-goals of our evangelism practices is convincing someone to come to our worship services. Why is that? I'm pretty sure we don't actually believe God only works within a given set of walls or timeframe, so why are we so concerned with bringing people into our building at a certain time instead of taking the love of God to them? Is it laziness? Do we feel too vulnerable out there in the world and want to return to our comfortable surroundings? Or is it a simple way of keeping score, where a big crowd at church equals successful completion of God's mission?
Whatever our reasoning, I don't think it's sound in light of what Jesus actually commanded us to do. The reason I don't think so comes from Jesus' actual last words in Matthew: "And remember, I am with you always, to the end of the age." Not a single word about us having to come to Him, and He's the Master. Imagine what we servants are called to do.
What did you see today?
A member of the Quaker meeting I attend sent an e-mail today introducing a woman who is planning to join us for the first time on Saturday. We are a small meeting, so new people are very noticeable.
Commentary
"Go therefore an make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything that I have commanded you." These words are almost the last things Jesus says in the gospel according to Matthew (New Revised Standard Version) and are referred to as The Great Commission.
No passage in the Bible has more power to both inspire and terrify Christians. We know that Jesus has done great things for us and theoretically we want to share that good news with everyone, but the practice is often lacking. I've been sampling Jim Henderson's excellent book Evangelism Without Additives, and it has a lot to say about both our discomfiture and our ineffectualness.
Henderson talks a lot about methodology. I'd like to talk a little about goals. It seems to me that one of the sub-goals of our evangelism practices is convincing someone to come to our worship services. Why is that? I'm pretty sure we don't actually believe God only works within a given set of walls or timeframe, so why are we so concerned with bringing people into our building at a certain time instead of taking the love of God to them? Is it laziness? Do we feel too vulnerable out there in the world and want to return to our comfortable surroundings? Or is it a simple way of keeping score, where a big crowd at church equals successful completion of God's mission?
Whatever our reasoning, I don't think it's sound in light of what Jesus actually commanded us to do. The reason I don't think so comes from Jesus' actual last words in Matthew: "And remember, I am with you always, to the end of the age." Not a single word about us having to come to Him, and He's the Master. Imagine what we servants are called to do.
What did you see today?
6/10/2009
I saw routing flags
Context
Because Shreve Memorial Library has 20 branches and uses a hub-and-spoke model to move materials around(similar to this one, but we try not to lose your luggage ;-)), we have pre-printed, color-coded routing flags that we stick in and sometimes on materials that say where they're going. The problem is, once the item arrives at its destination, the flag becomes temporarily useless. Nobody is trying to send things from the Main Library to the Main Library, after all. So each branch, when they've received a sizable number of these things with their name on them, bundles the flags up and sends them back to the Main Library hub. Our Interlibrary Loans Department is normally responsible for routing both the traveling material and the flags themselves.
I occasionally receive items (correspondence or pieces of hardware I need to look at) with Main Library flags attached to them. Since I receive so few I don't bother to give them to Interlibrary Loans; I just drop them off at the next branch I happen to visit. So I was looking at the three or four flags sitting on my desk awaiting redistribution today.
Commentary
I am not much of an environmentalist. I like to think this is not a character flaw on my part, but just a question of some other aspects of life taking higher priority. However, I do like the "reduce, reuse, recycle" mantra and try to apply it when I can. That's why I like the routing flags; they are single scraps of paper that can be reused over and over again.
So there's something that some of my coworkers do that drives me straight up a wall: they write my name and/or my floor on the flag, which renders it un-reusable. Oh sure, I'm going to be sent more mail at some point in the future, but no one's going to hold on to the routing flag with my name on it waiting for that eventuality. The floor designation's unnecessary anyway; it's Interlibrary Loans' job to know where everyone is in the Main Library. And if you want to attach my name, use a separate piece of paper; don't invalidate the routing flag! See, I told you I get up in arms about this.
So as I was looking at the unsullied, still-reusable flags on my desk, I was wondering why people don't just "do right" in this respect. It's something I frequently wonder about and I've come to the following conclusion: it's because they don't see the world the way I do. There is some quantity of people that don't look at an item that can easily be reused and say to themselves, "I should do everything I can to make that happen."
My first instinct in situations like this is to ponder what I can do to make people change. 45 years of life experience have actually taught me the answer: nothing. The good news is, recent religious exploration has convinced me that it's not only impossible to make everyone conform to my view of the world, it's not even desirable.
God is vast and vastly creative. No one person can perceive, appreciate and participate in all that He is doing. So our different ways of seeing the world are a gift we can offer to the Lord and to each other. For example, when I interact with a friend who thinks airline travel is immoral because of the ecological impact, I get to learn that just owning a Prius isn't enough to call myself an environmentalist, and she gets to see that people can hold other priorities in good faith, like wanting to build community through travel. Everybody gets to grow!
Share with me what you saw today!
Because Shreve Memorial Library has 20 branches and uses a hub-and-spoke model to move materials around(similar to this one, but we try not to lose your luggage ;-)), we have pre-printed, color-coded routing flags that we stick in and sometimes on materials that say where they're going. The problem is, once the item arrives at its destination, the flag becomes temporarily useless. Nobody is trying to send things from the Main Library to the Main Library, after all. So each branch, when they've received a sizable number of these things with their name on them, bundles the flags up and sends them back to the Main Library hub. Our Interlibrary Loans Department is normally responsible for routing both the traveling material and the flags themselves.
I occasionally receive items (correspondence or pieces of hardware I need to look at) with Main Library flags attached to them. Since I receive so few I don't bother to give them to Interlibrary Loans; I just drop them off at the next branch I happen to visit. So I was looking at the three or four flags sitting on my desk awaiting redistribution today.
Commentary
I am not much of an environmentalist. I like to think this is not a character flaw on my part, but just a question of some other aspects of life taking higher priority. However, I do like the "reduce, reuse, recycle" mantra and try to apply it when I can. That's why I like the routing flags; they are single scraps of paper that can be reused over and over again.
So there's something that some of my coworkers do that drives me straight up a wall: they write my name and/or my floor on the flag, which renders it un-reusable. Oh sure, I'm going to be sent more mail at some point in the future, but no one's going to hold on to the routing flag with my name on it waiting for that eventuality. The floor designation's unnecessary anyway; it's Interlibrary Loans' job to know where everyone is in the Main Library. And if you want to attach my name, use a separate piece of paper; don't invalidate the routing flag! See, I told you I get up in arms about this.
So as I was looking at the unsullied, still-reusable flags on my desk, I was wondering why people don't just "do right" in this respect. It's something I frequently wonder about and I've come to the following conclusion: it's because they don't see the world the way I do. There is some quantity of people that don't look at an item that can easily be reused and say to themselves, "I should do everything I can to make that happen."
My first instinct in situations like this is to ponder what I can do to make people change. 45 years of life experience have actually taught me the answer: nothing. The good news is, recent religious exploration has convinced me that it's not only impossible to make everyone conform to my view of the world, it's not even desirable.
God is vast and vastly creative. No one person can perceive, appreciate and participate in all that He is doing. So our different ways of seeing the world are a gift we can offer to the Lord and to each other. For example, when I interact with a friend who thinks airline travel is immoral because of the ecological impact, I get to learn that just owning a Prius isn't enough to call myself an environmentalist, and she gets to see that people can hold other priorities in good faith, like wanting to build community through travel. Everybody gets to grow!
Share with me what you saw today!
4/20/2009
I saw an older European-American man driving poorly
Context
In Shreveport, I-20 West has an off ramp that merges into northbound Common Street. As I was traveling north on Common this morning, one of the cars on this ramp failed to yield to oncoming traffic like it was supposed to. When I looked at the driver of the vehicle, I saw that he was an older European-American, and that he was looking down at the seat next to him rather than watching where he was going. I said "Sir!" in an exasperated tone as I swerved around him. At least one of the cars behind me, which had to swerve even more, honked at him.
Commentary
My theories as to what happened with the guy this morning all center around him not realizing he was sliding into traffic. In other words, he thought he had a moment or two to glance at his papers or his phone or whatever before he would have to pay attention to other cars, but he didn't. But that's not what I want to talk about. I want to talk about white privilege.
I am not a road-ragey type. This is one of the few areas in my life where I actually hew pretty closely to the Quaker peace testimony. I do not honk my horn in anger, only in warning or greeting. When my fellow drivers do something irritating, I usually just say or yell something in the privacy of my own vehicle and it usually isn't even profane or insulting. Something along the lines of "C'mon!" or "Seriously?" If I'm particularly irked I'll emulate my dad, who used to say "Well, friend . . . " in a very sarcastic tone. This is pretty funny in light of the fact that my dad was not a Quaker but a Baptist, but I digress.
However, I don't recall ever saying "Sir" before. Now maybe it's just because I live in Louisiana, where "yes, sir" and "no ma'am" have been codified into law. But I don't think so. I think it's because the driver was older than me, which definitely does deserve some respect, and because he was white and male, which doesn't necessarily.
So I guess my new mandate in the fight for equality is to refer to every bad driver, without prejudice, as sir or ma'am. Wish me luck!
What did you see today?
In Shreveport, I-20 West has an off ramp that merges into northbound Common Street. As I was traveling north on Common this morning, one of the cars on this ramp failed to yield to oncoming traffic like it was supposed to. When I looked at the driver of the vehicle, I saw that he was an older European-American, and that he was looking down at the seat next to him rather than watching where he was going. I said "Sir!" in an exasperated tone as I swerved around him. At least one of the cars behind me, which had to swerve even more, honked at him.
Commentary
My theories as to what happened with the guy this morning all center around him not realizing he was sliding into traffic. In other words, he thought he had a moment or two to glance at his papers or his phone or whatever before he would have to pay attention to other cars, but he didn't. But that's not what I want to talk about. I want to talk about white privilege.
I am not a road-ragey type. This is one of the few areas in my life where I actually hew pretty closely to the Quaker peace testimony. I do not honk my horn in anger, only in warning or greeting. When my fellow drivers do something irritating, I usually just say or yell something in the privacy of my own vehicle and it usually isn't even profane or insulting. Something along the lines of "C'mon!" or "Seriously?" If I'm particularly irked I'll emulate my dad, who used to say "Well, friend . . . " in a very sarcastic tone. This is pretty funny in light of the fact that my dad was not a Quaker but a Baptist, but I digress.
However, I don't recall ever saying "Sir" before. Now maybe it's just because I live in Louisiana, where "yes, sir" and "no ma'am" have been codified into law. But I don't think so. I think it's because the driver was older than me, which definitely does deserve some respect, and because he was white and male, which doesn't necessarily.
So I guess my new mandate in the fight for equality is to refer to every bad driver, without prejudice, as sir or ma'am. Wish me luck!
What did you see today?
4/06/2008
I saw a waitress trying to do her job.
Context
I'm still at the SIRSI Superconference. For the second day running, I went to the hotel buffet for breakfast. It was much busier today than yesterday, and unlike yesterday, I didn't ask for anything special to drink. Today when I completed my meal I had to flag someone down and ask her how to get a check because unlike yesterday, I didn't know who my waitress was. The woman who eventually brought my bill was very apologetic.
Commentary
Two blog entries in two days! Conferences are inspirational!
You may think this is going to be another rant about poor customer service, but it's not. It's going to be about something else near and dear to my heart: hog-tying professionals.
I like breakfast buffets, but I think if I was professional waitress they would bug me. First of all, any time you work in concert with self-service you get tipped less ("I did all the work. Why should I tip her?"). But I also think it would get in the way of doing my job. Consider: a good waitress has a routine for getting all her tasks done quickly and efficiently (e.g. get drink orders, bring drinks, get food orders, bring food, check progress of meal, bring check, pick up check, bus table, done). She probably also has an internal clock that tells her approximately how long each of these tasks takes. As customers, part of what we consider good service is that each stage of our meal is neither rushed nor unduly delayed.
Now change the scenario to how a buffet works: the waitress only does some of her tasks and the rest are taken over by people who a) don't really know what they're doing and b) don't follow her standard rhythm at all. And yet she's still expected to know where they are in the routine so she can respond when she is needed. The structures that have been put in place to make the procedure easier for laypeople make it more difficult for her. But we still don't tip her!
As a librarian, I see this situation play out when it comes to information seeking. I have training on how to make databases give up their secrets. I won't bore you with the details. But these days the expectation is that everyone should be able to find their own information. Since most people aren't trained in how to do that, interfaces become more forgiving of vagueness and mistakes. Perhaps this means that most of the time when you search for something on the Internet, no matter how little you know about what you're doing, you find something useful somewhere in the results you're offered.
But often when I do an online search, I have to take extra effort to weed out results that don't really fit my query because the program thought I might have made a mistake formulating it. What makes life easier for you makes it harder for me. As a result, my hard-won skills become devalued because "anyone can find adequate stuff on the Internet." Possibly, but if the user-friendly software would get out of my way, I'd find better stuff faster. I'm a professional, after all.
What did you see today?
I'm still at the SIRSI Superconference. For the second day running, I went to the hotel buffet for breakfast. It was much busier today than yesterday, and unlike yesterday, I didn't ask for anything special to drink. Today when I completed my meal I had to flag someone down and ask her how to get a check because unlike yesterday, I didn't know who my waitress was. The woman who eventually brought my bill was very apologetic.
Commentary
Two blog entries in two days! Conferences are inspirational!
You may think this is going to be another rant about poor customer service, but it's not. It's going to be about something else near and dear to my heart: hog-tying professionals.
I like breakfast buffets, but I think if I was professional waitress they would bug me. First of all, any time you work in concert with self-service you get tipped less ("I did all the work. Why should I tip her?"). But I also think it would get in the way of doing my job. Consider: a good waitress has a routine for getting all her tasks done quickly and efficiently (e.g. get drink orders, bring drinks, get food orders, bring food, check progress of meal, bring check, pick up check, bus table, done). She probably also has an internal clock that tells her approximately how long each of these tasks takes. As customers, part of what we consider good service is that each stage of our meal is neither rushed nor unduly delayed.
Now change the scenario to how a buffet works: the waitress only does some of her tasks and the rest are taken over by people who a) don't really know what they're doing and b) don't follow her standard rhythm at all. And yet she's still expected to know where they are in the routine so she can respond when she is needed. The structures that have been put in place to make the procedure easier for laypeople make it more difficult for her. But we still don't tip her!
As a librarian, I see this situation play out when it comes to information seeking. I have training on how to make databases give up their secrets. I won't bore you with the details. But these days the expectation is that everyone should be able to find their own information. Since most people aren't trained in how to do that, interfaces become more forgiving of vagueness and mistakes. Perhaps this means that most of the time when you search for something on the Internet, no matter how little you know about what you're doing, you find something useful somewhere in the results you're offered.
But often when I do an online search, I have to take extra effort to weed out results that don't really fit my query because the program thought I might have made a mistake formulating it. What makes life easier for you makes it harder for me. As a result, my hard-won skills become devalued because "anyone can find adequate stuff on the Internet." Possibly, but if the user-friendly software would get out of my way, I'd find better stuff faster. I'm a professional, after all.
What did you see today?
4/05/2008
I saw the morning light
Context
I'm in Detroit for the SiRSI Superconference, which I've mentioned in a previous blog post. My hotel room is on the 53rd floor (!) of the Marriott Renaissance Center. When I arrived last night I could see an variety of city lights outside my window, including the very complex sign for the Fox Theater. This morning when I opened my curtains just after daybreak, I couldn't see the Fox Theater at all.
Commentary
I think I frequently blog when I travel because it's a great opportunity to see new stuff. And if you're going to travel, I highly recommend staying on the 53rd floor of the Marriott Renaissance Center. I could sit here in front of the window with my iTunes on all day if I didn't have conference events to attend. It's better than television! And that's saying a lot, 'cuz I likes me some television.
Anyway, the disappearance of the Fox was quite startling today. It might have happened because they turn off the sign in the daytime, but I think it more likely that it just couldn't compete with the brilliance of the sun. It's like certain temptations of this world. In a particular context they're bright and attractive, or maybe a little mysterious (I was really fascinated by how this sign worked!). For whatever reason, you can't tear your attention away. But in light of the things you can see by the Spirit, they fade so badly that it's as if they never existed.
Please don't get me wrong. I have nothing against the Fox Theater or their sign and I don't think it's a hotbed of evil or anything (traditional Quakers were opposed to the theater, but I'm not). I'm just of a metaphorical cast of mind at the moment.
What did you see today?
I'm in Detroit for the SiRSI Superconference, which I've mentioned in a previous blog post. My hotel room is on the 53rd floor (!) of the Marriott Renaissance Center. When I arrived last night I could see an variety of city lights outside my window, including the very complex sign for the Fox Theater. This morning when I opened my curtains just after daybreak, I couldn't see the Fox Theater at all.
Commentary
I think I frequently blog when I travel because it's a great opportunity to see new stuff. And if you're going to travel, I highly recommend staying on the 53rd floor of the Marriott Renaissance Center. I could sit here in front of the window with my iTunes on all day if I didn't have conference events to attend. It's better than television! And that's saying a lot, 'cuz I likes me some television.
Anyway, the disappearance of the Fox was quite startling today. It might have happened because they turn off the sign in the daytime, but I think it more likely that it just couldn't compete with the brilliance of the sun. It's like certain temptations of this world. In a particular context they're bright and attractive, or maybe a little mysterious (I was really fascinated by how this sign worked!). For whatever reason, you can't tear your attention away. But in light of the things you can see by the Spirit, they fade so badly that it's as if they never existed.
Please don't get me wrong. I have nothing against the Fox Theater or their sign and I don't think it's a hotbed of evil or anything (traditional Quakers were opposed to the theater, but I'm not). I'm just of a metaphorical cast of mind at the moment.
What did you see today?
8/13/2007
I saw single-minded salmon
Context
I'm in Juneau, Alaska for vacation this week. Juneau is on the Gastineau Channel, where scads of salmon come after they've matured to swim up their home streams, spawn and die, so I've had quite a few chances to see the swimming upstream portion of this cycle. There are many obstacles, both manmade and natural, preventing the salmon from getting to their destination. These include pools where the water gets too shallow for the salmon to breathe when the tide goes out.
Commentary
My title up there is a misnomer because salmon, of course, are not single-minded. They have no minds at all. They have a biological imperative that compels them to swim upstream. As a human being though, my tendency is to anthropomorphize and say, "what are those salmon thinking?"
As I was watching the salmon making their way up a particular stream today, I thought I saw a couple saying to themselves, "aha! I've found the easy way to get up this stream and now I'll get there before everyone else and have a really successful spawn!" Actually, they were headed straight for one of those shallows I mentioned above, where several of their dead buddies had already created a feast for seagulls.
So this made me think about single-mindedness. Salmon have no choice in the matter, but we do. Do we get so focused on immediate goals that we fail to see the consequences of our actions? Do we look for the quick answer instead of considering the longer path that might have better rewards? Can we learn something from fish that have no minds at all?
What did you see today?
I'm in Juneau, Alaska for vacation this week. Juneau is on the Gastineau Channel, where scads of salmon come after they've matured to swim up their home streams, spawn and die, so I've had quite a few chances to see the swimming upstream portion of this cycle. There are many obstacles, both manmade and natural, preventing the salmon from getting to their destination. These include pools where the water gets too shallow for the salmon to breathe when the tide goes out.
Commentary
My title up there is a misnomer because salmon, of course, are not single-minded. They have no minds at all. They have a biological imperative that compels them to swim upstream. As a human being though, my tendency is to anthropomorphize and say, "what are those salmon thinking?"
As I was watching the salmon making their way up a particular stream today, I thought I saw a couple saying to themselves, "aha! I've found the easy way to get up this stream and now I'll get there before everyone else and have a really successful spawn!" Actually, they were headed straight for one of those shallows I mentioned above, where several of their dead buddies had already created a feast for seagulls.
So this made me think about single-mindedness. Salmon have no choice in the matter, but we do. Do we get so focused on immediate goals that we fail to see the consequences of our actions? Do we look for the quick answer instead of considering the longer path that might have better rewards? Can we learn something from fish that have no minds at all?
What did you see today?
3/10/2006
I heard someone make a promise he couldn't keep.
Context
I'm afraid to fly, even though I've done it for 35 years. Today the pilot on my Northwest Airlines flight said he promised the crew would get us safely to our destination. Quakers take the Biblical injunction against oaths pretty seriously, as exemplified by this excerpt from the Faith and Practice of the Pacific Yearly Meeting.
Commentary
In case you didn't notice, I've changed the name of this blog. The call I'm answering with it was to open my eyes and open my mouth. Since I'm already typing instead of opening my mouth, I'm thinking that the "eyes" part can be stretched a little as well. The blog will probably still predominantly consist of things I see and hear, but if I start tasting, smelling or touching things I need to call attention to, you'll be the first to know.
For a split second, I'm almost felt reassured when the pilot promised to get me safely to my destination. Then I realized he was lying. People sometimes object when I put it bluntly like that, but to me lying describes what you say, not what you intend. Since there are an almost infinite number of things that could have kept me from getting safely to my destination in spite of the pilot's best intentions, he was lying. The most truthful thing he could have said was that he was going to do his best. Even venturing to promise the best efforts of other people on the crew would have been pushing it.
Most of the time, I pay the most attention to the part of Matthew 5:33-37 that says to just say yes or no, rather than taking an oath (this is stated more strongly in James 5:12). Today I started thinking more about the surrounding language that says there's no point in swearing by anything, because we don't control anything. I'm wondering if one of the reasons we're not supposed to take oaths is that not only are we not in control of what we swear by, but usually don't have as much influence over what we swear to as we might think.
Consider: does anyone really tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth? If God helped us I suppose we could, but I know it doesn't often happen in my life. I'm not even trying to be deceitful; I've just forgotten stuff. Sometimes, without even realizing it, I've made up stuff to fill in the gaps where I've forgotten stuff. Anyone with relatives knows that either you or them must be doing that, given how different the accounts of the same event are.
The funny thing is that when I'm sitting on a plane, I'm more likely to believe a pilot, who says he's going to get me to my destination safely, than God, who says all things work together for good for those who love Him (Romans 8:28 NRSV). It's ridiculous how low we set our sights. Or our hearing.
What did you hear today?
I'm afraid to fly, even though I've done it for 35 years. Today the pilot on my Northwest Airlines flight said he promised the crew would get us safely to our destination. Quakers take the Biblical injunction against oaths pretty seriously, as exemplified by this excerpt from the Faith and Practice of the Pacific Yearly Meeting.
Commentary
In case you didn't notice, I've changed the name of this blog. The call I'm answering with it was to open my eyes and open my mouth. Since I'm already typing instead of opening my mouth, I'm thinking that the "eyes" part can be stretched a little as well. The blog will probably still predominantly consist of things I see and hear, but if I start tasting, smelling or touching things I need to call attention to, you'll be the first to know.
For a split second, I'm almost felt reassured when the pilot promised to get me safely to my destination. Then I realized he was lying. People sometimes object when I put it bluntly like that, but to me lying describes what you say, not what you intend. Since there are an almost infinite number of things that could have kept me from getting safely to my destination in spite of the pilot's best intentions, he was lying. The most truthful thing he could have said was that he was going to do his best. Even venturing to promise the best efforts of other people on the crew would have been pushing it.
Most of the time, I pay the most attention to the part of Matthew 5:33-37 that says to just say yes or no, rather than taking an oath (this is stated more strongly in James 5:12). Today I started thinking more about the surrounding language that says there's no point in swearing by anything, because we don't control anything. I'm wondering if one of the reasons we're not supposed to take oaths is that not only are we not in control of what we swear by, but usually don't have as much influence over what we swear to as we might think.
Consider: does anyone really tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth? If God helped us I suppose we could, but I know it doesn't often happen in my life. I'm not even trying to be deceitful; I've just forgotten stuff. Sometimes, without even realizing it, I've made up stuff to fill in the gaps where I've forgotten stuff. Anyone with relatives knows that either you or them must be doing that, given how different the accounts of the same event are.
The funny thing is that when I'm sitting on a plane, I'm more likely to believe a pilot, who says he's going to get me to my destination safely, than God, who says all things work together for good for those who love Him (Romans 8:28 NRSV). It's ridiculous how low we set our sights. Or our hearing.
What did you hear today?
3/07/2006
I saw two African-American guys at my hotel.
Context
I’m attending the SirsiDynix Superconference, which is being held at the Gaylord Opryland Resort and Convention Center. Gaylord Opryland is a huge, enclosed facility with a hotel, shops, restaurants, a convention center, and even a river all under one roof. Or one skylight, if you will. I have seen very few African-Americans since I arrived.
Commentary
I always feel like there’s something wrong when I’m in a place that seems lily white. Some of that out-of-whack feeling may come from residing in Shreveport, which is predominantly African-American. However, I also grew up as a member of a racial minority in Mexico City, so I think being in the majority always makes me feel weird.
Yesterday, I would have told you that I was going completely the other way. It seemed like every black face I saw was causing a mental hiccup in me. “What are those people doing here? Are they supposed to be in the convention area?” So, two days away from Shreveport and I become a total racist.
It’s not that simple, though. I had no qualms at all about the two African-American guys I saw today. They were middle-aged, professionally dressed, and out and about pretty early in the morning. In other words, even though they weren’t wearing the seemingly ubiquitous name badges, they looked like they were at a convention. And now that I think about it, I was pretty uncertain about the white kids in the baggy shorts I saw yesterday, too.
The idea that in the United States we are more culturalist than racist is not a new one, but it’s often unpopular. Bill Cosby was quickly criticized for daring to suggest that some African-Americans might actually be bringing negative reactions on themselves by their language and dress. But I’m wondering if we have reached a place that was unanticipated by Dr. King, where people are not judged by the color of their skin or the content of their character, but by the length of their pants and the size of their vocabulary.
I’m not saying this is a morally superior criterion for prejudice, but it is a different one. Without the use of heavy makeup, you have no control over your racial identity. Usually, however, you can control your speech patterns and your fashion choices. Here are some questions I think we all struggle with: How much am I willing to change in order to not trigger the prejudices of people like employers, family members, and random passers-by on the street? How much is it up to them to change instead?
What did you see today?
I’m attending the SirsiDynix Superconference, which is being held at the Gaylord Opryland Resort and Convention Center. Gaylord Opryland is a huge, enclosed facility with a hotel, shops, restaurants, a convention center, and even a river all under one roof. Or one skylight, if you will. I have seen very few African-Americans since I arrived.
Commentary
I always feel like there’s something wrong when I’m in a place that seems lily white. Some of that out-of-whack feeling may come from residing in Shreveport, which is predominantly African-American. However, I also grew up as a member of a racial minority in Mexico City, so I think being in the majority always makes me feel weird.
Yesterday, I would have told you that I was going completely the other way. It seemed like every black face I saw was causing a mental hiccup in me. “What are those people doing here? Are they supposed to be in the convention area?” So, two days away from Shreveport and I become a total racist.
It’s not that simple, though. I had no qualms at all about the two African-American guys I saw today. They were middle-aged, professionally dressed, and out and about pretty early in the morning. In other words, even though they weren’t wearing the seemingly ubiquitous name badges, they looked like they were at a convention. And now that I think about it, I was pretty uncertain about the white kids in the baggy shorts I saw yesterday, too.
The idea that in the United States we are more culturalist than racist is not a new one, but it’s often unpopular. Bill Cosby was quickly criticized for daring to suggest that some African-Americans might actually be bringing negative reactions on themselves by their language and dress. But I’m wondering if we have reached a place that was unanticipated by Dr. King, where people are not judged by the color of their skin or the content of their character, but by the length of their pants and the size of their vocabulary.
I’m not saying this is a morally superior criterion for prejudice, but it is a different one. Without the use of heavy makeup, you have no control over your racial identity. Usually, however, you can control your speech patterns and your fashion choices. Here are some questions I think we all struggle with: How much am I willing to change in order to not trigger the prejudices of people like employers, family members, and random passers-by on the street? How much is it up to them to change instead?
What did you see today?
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